First comes love, then comes marriage.....

Then comes a baby in the baby carriage.

 Haha if only life worked this way. When we were faced with this situation I said to Dr. Denker (as I am crying hysterically), "This is just not what we had planned." He told me some wise words that day, "Hun, you don't plan your life. God plans your life." Wow! This is so true. If anyone would have ever said that to me before I probably would have responded with, "No life is about the choices you make and the effects they have on your life."

Beni and I had this all planned out really, Engagement: 6 months to 1 year. Marriage: 2-3 years. Kids: 3-5 years. HAHAHA is what I say to that now. NOW we have decided to do it all backwards.

I am not a person who believes that just because you are having a child together you must get married. But let me be clear, if Beni were to ask I would say yes in a heartbeat. Although, we would then postpone until after we have our child. We both love eachother very much. We are very committed to making the best of our nontraditional situation. We both intend to be great parents and that is what our focus is and needs to be on at this moment.

So for all that are chomping at the bit, Yes I would love to marry Beni and would do it today. But our decision is to hold off until we can put all of our energy into making our special day as special as possible.

Drum Roll Please.......

I only began this blog a couple days ago, in hopes for everyone to understand our situation and have the ability to be updated on a regular basis. Well, the thought to begin this only came to my mind once we found out the news........

WE ARE PREGNANT!

As some of you may know, we have been dealing with these issues since early April and began trying in mid-June. From the information Dr. Denker had given us we didn't expect it to happen this fast. Dr. Denker had told us, "If you are not pregnant by August, I want you to start in-vitro." So this definitely came as a shock.

It is kind of funny how it all came to happen but here is the story:

Since we decided that we were going to start a family, Beni started working a second job in Miami. He is working 7 days a week until school starts again so that we can save lots of money. Well, Dr. Denker had me doing Ovulation Kits to make sure #1: I am ovulating and #2: when I am ovulating. Well as it would happen, I started ovulating Day 1 of the 3 days that Beni is in Miami. (He stays with his parents those 3 days) So I freaked! In my head I was thinking, "I am going to be fertile for the 3 days by boyfriend isn't here!" So I had to "make arrangements." I took the Tri-Rail down to Miami after work for those three days to make sure we could get it done. LOL. This was the week of the 4th of July.

So a week later I was feeling really bloated and didn't really understand it. I felt like I had eaten a 10 course meal. So Wednesday the 11th was the soonest I could use the early result pregnancy tests to see if we had made it work. They advise you to use them in the AM so that was what I did first thing that morning. I got a negative result. I was suuuuuuppppper bummed. I thought well hopefully, it is just to soon. I told myself that I would not test again until I missed my period, as it was to much of an emotional roller coaster.

Let me just say, when women say, "I knew I was pregnant, I could just feel it" I know what they mean. That whole week, I kept saying to my co-worker, I know I pregnant, I just know.

Welllllllll, Friday came along and I only work half days, therefore I was home before Beni. When I got home, I could smell the cat box and it stunk. Phewww. Beni has really been on me about not changing that thing because he is very worried and doesn't want to compromise anything. Well as some of you know, I am very stubborn and have to do things almost as immediately as I think them up. I decided, I would take a pregnancy test and if it was negative I would clean it. Well I took my first test: Positive w/ a faint line. Wait, is this for real? I called Nana, I was jumping up and down! I pregnant, I'm Pregnant.

I love that lady. She said, "I would be jumping up and down too but my back hurts to much." God love her. So like all women, I didn't believe it so I went to the store to buy a different brand of tests. After 4 tests and 4 positive results I finally believed it.

Telling Beni

I had already plotted how I would tell Beni when I found out. Since he was at work, I made reservations at a nice restaurant in Boca for us to have dinner. I called him and told him that I had made reservations and that he needed to hurry home. Once he got home I rushed him into the shower as I was already to go. As I was putting on my shoes Beni went to his boxer drawer for a pair of boxers and found baby diapers and 4 positive pregnancy tests. He looked at me with shock, surprise, and happiness. "We're Pregnant!" We both hugged each other and just cried. This was truly our miracle, one we created. We had been through so much in our lives, our relationship, and the past couple months, that this was such a sigh of relief for us.

We took pictures that night out having dinner and then took a preliminary belly picture. We followed up with the doctor and confirmed via blood test that we indeed are pregnant. I am currently 5 weeks pregnant. We both realize it is very early and that most people don't announce these things this soon. We want our family and friends to know and understand what we are going through and we are both keeping positive thoughts for a healthy pregnancy. We have an appointment scheduled on August 3rd for our 1st ultrasound. Please keep us in your thoughts!

Celebratory Dinner!

 7/13/2012





The Beginning

This is quite an interesting endeavour that we are about to embark on and we wanted everyone to be able to follow our journey whether you live close or far, far away.

Beni and I met 2 years ago working together for Banfield in Miami. We began to date once I left to manage my animal hospital in Delray. About a year ago, Beni and I moved in with each other and decided that we wanted to be completely committed and one day get married.

For about 3 years I have been apart of a registry to donate my eggs. In April, I was called as a couple had chosen me to be their donor. I was required to do the preliminary testing to make sure I would be a good candidate. I was not given good new. The fertility clinic told me that I was not very fertile and that I needed to follow up with my OBGYN.

I scheduled an appointment with Dr. Bernick almost immediately as I was very concerned and had a gut feeling that this was going to be bad. When we went in and explained everything to Dr. Bernick, he assured us not to worry and that he would repeat testing and completed a couple additional tests. He completed the following tests:

FSH:  Follicle-stimulating hormone test measures the amount of follicle-stimulating  hormone (FSH) in a blood sample. FSH is produced by the pituitary gland In women, FSH helps control the menstral cycle and the production of eggs by the ovaries. The amount of FSH varies throughout a woman's menstrual cycle and is highest just before she releases an egg (ovulates). The higher the FSH levels the harder the ovaries are working to produce and egg.

-> My levels were very elevated

AMH: Anti-Mullerian Hormone. It is also called MIS (Mullerian Inhibiting Substance) . Since AMH is produced directly by the ovarian follicles, AMH levels correlate with the number of antral follicles in the ovaries . It has been documented that women with lower AMH have lower antral follicular counts and produce a lower number of oocytes compared with women with higher levels. 

-> My levels were EXTREMELY low for someone my age.

Vaginal Ultrasound: This was completed to check the number of follicles that I had on each ovary which was 3 for a total of 6. Someone my age and of good healthy should have approximentaly 8-10 each ovary for a total of 16-20 follicles each month.

After Dr. Bernick saw my results he immediately referred me to Dr. Denker a fertility specialist who gave us the news. * I am in the early stages of menopuase*  He diagnosed me with Premature Ovarian Failure. I explained to Dr. Denker that I had expected a diagnoses close to this as I had done some research and that Beni and I expected that we would start to try for a family in about 6-8 months. Dr. Denker simply said, "You don't have 6 months, in 6 months you may not have any more eggs left. Ovarian Failure, once it begins, is a rapid progression and will leave you to become infertile."

Beni and I were is shock (along with Nana who has been my rock through this whole thing). We needed to start buidling a family now? When are we going to get married? How long will it take? Will we have to try fertility treatments? There were so many questions.

OUR DECISION

For those who know me well, they will be reading this and thinking, "she said she never wanted kids!" That is correct, I never thought I wanted them. I always felt as I was to selfish and that my animal were enough. Although, when you are faced with a decision of now or never you perspectives change. I know Beni has always wanted children and a large family at that. I knew as soon as Dr. Denker gave us that information that I had to have a baby. I had to stop being selfish and give my partner what he has always wanted. I knew deep down that a child would bring me so much joy and that Beni and I would make wonderful parents. After speaking with both of our families, we have decided to try to start a family.

- Tiffany